Tag Archives: Time travel

How To Time Travel Now

Some Seeding Required

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“Seeding Your Timeline” Found Footage

Your Time Authority is hard at work throughout the stream of time. “Some Seeding Required”. Some say the timeline has been seeded all throughout history to ready the future and past for the eventuality of time travel. Seeding comes in many forms, just as a gardener tends to her farm with a wide variety of tools. It seems one such “seed” come as “teasers” or video advertisements. Those who have paid close attention to these archives as well as associated time travel history will know items are constantly being left behind or “dropped” on the timeline. These drops are noted closely by those who really care — be it the TA or other less respectable institutions for time security and linear integrity, (your Authority will detail these organizations and rank their damage-threat to the timeline in a future post).

Time travel promotion items are being left along the path forward on what will be eventual and normalized travel through time. Some of these items are: time travel guides (both brand new and heavily work and notated),  informational disks wrapped in protective tin foil, or as content on mysterious websites. It only makes sense that as the inevitable transition into a time traveling future draws closer, more items will be left behind for “finding” or as put before: the seeding has begun!

Your current TA, or the TA of this era, exists as little more than a skeleton crew of future-forward travelers. This early-on TA waits anxiously for news from the TA which exists in full power further along the timeline. As we here at the current TA wait for our numbers to grow, we steadily receive the seeds that will help grow our future organization from the others.

Time Traveler storms off
From The Future, How To Time Travel Now

Time Traveler One — Interviewed!

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The first Time Authority (TA) sanctioned interview with a Time Traveler goes off the rails.

The first Time Authority (TA) sanctioned interview with a Time Traveler goes off the time rails.

Time Travel Interview goes awry. Time traveler is denied
“Keep your 2014 hands to yourself lowly past citizen” or at least that’s how the interviewer felt.

Time Traveler storms off

The unfortunate ending to the first interview with a time traveler

The first Time Traveler has been interviewed and enthusiasts of time travel have found the exchange either promising or frustrating depending on their linear perspective. The novelty of an interview with an actual time traveler has been lost on some time travel “haters”. Others have found the exchange between interviewer and traveler spirited and inspiring .

The interviewee claims to have traveled from the far future back to our point in time. The future traveler states he was sent with a message for us back here in the past. Our current representative did as thorough an interview as possible within the parameters that the traveler permitted. Prior to the interview there were numerous “drops” of information to inform the interviewer and Time Authority. These packages were left at pre-arranged locations and as answering machine messages received by the interviewer through time.

Some viewers have noted that the interviewer and the traveler share  a distinctness in similarity. These viewers have implied that the interviewer and interviewee might be the same person. Additionally, others have been critical of the traveler’s sense of fashion (or lack of). These meandering and unsubstantiated accusations are at once discouraging and confused. The idea that an institution (even in its fetal phase) as important as The Time Authority wasting time manipulating footage is tedious and ridiculous. It would require complicated green-screening then carefully matching answer footage  with footage of the questions.  As for fashion, the traveler and crew had long discussions about how he would first present himself. Both traveler and crew were aware that the choice would not go un-criticized.

In the end, the TA stands by this first interview even when the traveler does not — he storms out. Even though the traveler didn’t stay, the messages he began filtering are important:

  • Time travel is real.
  • Time travel will happen in our lifetime.
  • The future holds uncertainties and lessons for us in the past.

If the the time travel enthusiast hasn’t yet encountered this interview, your Time Authority recommends doing so now.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9D97HQkFcrI

Lil' Timey, Tips For The Traveler

Time Traveler Rule #2

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Time Travel Rule #2: You break it you buy it… FOREVER.

Break something — a Prehistoric Egyptian jar (brand-new and at the same time preciously old) — crash the first Model T, or lose a contact lens in 1902 — the traveler is advised to visit the nearest Time Authority Remediation Branch and admit guilt to aid in the historical scrub-down. The Eternal Lord Bradbury has been proven right over and over again concerning his “Don’t step no bugs” edict. The traveler is cautioned to find a balance between traveler’s O.C.D. and reckless breakage of historic artifacts. Remember, on the timeline everything is a historic artifact.

 

How To Time Travel Now

The Do’s and Irritating Don’t’s of Time Travel

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Do / DontEveryone has heard the don’t’s that threaten time travel disasters: “Don’t meet your past self!” “Don’t so much as even sneeze on the timeline,” “Don’t date your great-great grandmother no matter how hot she is!” Don’t, Don’t, Don’t! But time travelers are “Do-ers” not “Don’t-ers” and all that can’t-do talk can really get a time traveler down. Hey, you didn’t companion-up, wait all those years for time travel to be invented, or actually invent time travel to then get all negative about it.

Still, there are hard and fast rules established by the Time Authority that every traveler needs to know. The Time Authority is a multi-century, multi-timeline regulatory agency in charge of keeping the timeline consistent, linear, and like a high-fiber diet for the timestream — regular. A recently “found” guidebook to time travel provides user-friendly tips to understanding the Authority’s laws and how to stay safely on the right side of them. Here we’ll slowly dole out the list of top time-traveling “No-No’s” to keep the traveler on the straight and narrow — non-linearly, of course — slowly in case the TA finds this information harmful to the timeline.